My New Planner

Summer.

Me. Just kidding...

To most people, that means hammocks, warm breezes, and leisurely days. And in the past, that is how it's been for me as well. After about the second week of summer, once my ambition has died completely (for a more detailed explanation, click here), I usually just laze around the house, read books, play copious quantities of Marco Polo, and watch Avatar: The Last Airbender. Because my friends and I watch way too much Avatar. And at the end of the summer, I am incredibly well-rested but left with the horrible aftertaste of a summer that has not been really used; not capitalized upon like it could have been. Not this summer, though! In fact, I have never been so busy before, potentially in my life.

I've never had a job before, so in typical fashion I did not get just one summer job. No, I got two... and a half. I am filling in for a receptionist at an insurance agency in town while she is out, which is pretty easy office stuff. I basically answer phones and write payment receipts, so not bad. I also got a paid internship in the laboratory in a local hospital (only about 20 minutes from home). I haven't gotten to work there yet because I need to have a tuberculosis test beforehand... Not that I'm bawling that I haven't had to do that yet... And I also auditioned for and got hired by the Entertainment department at an amusement park. Which is about an hour away from home... So it is a real hike on highways for someone not so used to four lanes and rotaries.

I am now a high school English teacher...

I am also, as you (but no one read this but me, so I should write "I") know, I am also in two
shows this summer, a play and a revue, so things are certainly interesting in my life right now. For the first time in my life, I bought a planner to keep track of things. How sad is that?

So I need to go sleep, or I will DIE. Wish me luck for this summer...

Revue Casting

I. Am. Marlow.

So the other day, it was pouring out, but unlike a normal person I was not curled up inside with a cup of tea and a book. No, I was on the third hour of a hike in the middle of the woods. And this was no normal hike. This was a Marlow-style fight into the Heart of Darkness. No trails for us; my friend and on were on a slog through real woods. We almost died about 67 times on cliffs and roacks and steep slopes of slippery moss. We rope-swung into a freezing river and picniced under a tree and found an old abandoned foundation. It was intense. In the middle of this hike as the rain poured down and the leaves slapped against me legs and face and entire self, my phone buzzed. Not recognizing the number, I figured that I should probably answer it and boy was I glad I did! It was the director of Showstoppers, the Broadway revue I had auditioned for. He told me that I was in!

Being that I was in the middle of the woods, I thanked him and ended the call. Later, I got a call from a friend who also had auditioned (and coincidentally the producer of Cirle Mirror Transformation) asking if I was in and what I had gotten. I eventually got back in touch with the Showstoppers team, and they told me that I will be showcased as Helga in Cabaret, Patti Simcox in Grease, and Penny in Hairspray as well as extensive dance stuff! So I'm pretty excited! I know that this was short, but that's all for today, folks! Come back next time, when we talk about other random topics that I am unable to predict at this time.

Play Auditions (Or, I Get Really Lost...)

So last week, I decided to audition for a straight play entitled Circle Mirror Transformation. I knew almost nothing about the play going in, one of the co-producers had been a fellow Ronnette in Little Shop of Horrors, so I decided to audition if only for the chance to hang out with her for a few hours. I don't, on principle, audition for things that do not have a role for me, but I had read a synopsis of the play and found that one of the five parts was right in my age category.

Me, auditioning for a play.

That day, I was still unsure if I actually wanted to take the audition because I had auditioned for the revue the night before and I didn't want to have too much on my plate going forward. The audition was at 7 om; I had a doctor's appointment that ended at 6:30. About 15 minutes before I had to leave for the doctor's, I decided that YOLO, I was going to audition for the play! I ran downstairs, printed out a copy of my resume and headshot, Mapquested (is that a verb?) directions to the audition, and flew out of the house. I was (almost) on time for
my appointment, but what is a couple minutes in the grand scheme of life? (I was only two minutes late) After the appointment, I hopped in the car and followed my directions all the way there until... a bridge was closed.  

Yeah. About that...


And there were no detour signs to be seen. Heavy sigh.

And, like an idiot, I used a printout of directions instead of just taking the time to grab the GPS, so I had no way of knowing how to find another way over the river that didn't involve swimming or superhuman powers. I called my stepfather (unfortunately for him, I call him every time I get lost, which is relatively frequently) and told him where I was. This is the first time in my life that he wasn't able to immediately figure out what sort of a debacle I had gotten myself into. I drove back the way I came, naming landmarks (of which there weren't many) and he still couldn't figure out where I was (which kind of scared me since it was obviously not the best area). By this time, it was 7:05 and I was still a good way away from the audition. But then, I saw...

A DETOUR SIGN!!!


Hoping that it was the detour I needed and not something else, I followed the signs blindly. They were really far apart, and I kept stressing out that I had done something wrong before another magically appeared before me like a knight in shining armor through a wall of fire.

Long story short, my stepdad had his friend call me and talk me through getting to the audition once I finished the detour. It ended up being in one of the sketchiest places I have ever seen in my life. The only reason I could even tell I had found the auditions was the tiny "Auditions" sign posted in the window... I felt like I was in an episode of SVU. The street was deserted besides the cars parked along the edge. The streetlights illuminated patches of the pavement, wet from the drizzle, while leaving other sections shrouded in shadow. On one side of the street, the dark, deserted warehouses and mill buildings watched me run from my car to the shadow of a doorstep as the canal flowed sluggishly past, bordering the street's other side.

It was creepy.

I got the audition about 20 minutes late, but it was totally fine because other people got there far later and I was not the only one to have been duped by the evil bridge detour. We played some theatre games, most notably the play's namesake, Circle Mirror Transformation, and then started the cold readings. I have never been to an audition in which they had everyone read SO MANY TIMES! We were there for three hours, reading the same scenes over and over again. Needless to say, that got boring. I think I did alright, but really did not think that I would get cast for I had never auditioned for a straight play before and the writing of the scenes was far more "human" than I was used to. It was written beautifully, but was very difficult for the play is riddled with silences and pauses that often mean more than the words themselves. I left (still imagining I was going to become an episode of SVU) with a general air of blah at my audition. I was glad I had done it, but had very little hope of getting a part and was still focused on the revue.

Me, in a part way older than myself...

I went home, watched some Star Trek TNG, and went to bed. Imagine my suprise when, the next, I got a call about the play. I steeled myself for a rejection... but they offered me a part! And not the one I had been expecting. Because they had not had anyone audition in the correct age category for a character a good 7 to 10 years older than myself, they offered me that part but also the one in the correct age category if I didn't want to play someone so much older. Feeling incredibly uncomfortable with the idea of playing a role that was so outside my comfort zone, I said I had to think about it. I was also still waiting to hear back from the revue, so I didn't know if I could do both. A few days later, I asked to see the script to see exactly what I would have to do in this role. After reading the script, I knew that I would not be able to do the older part justice, for there were things required that I was not in the least bit experienced or comfortable enough to do on the stage. And I'm not going to go into any more detail than that. I accepted the younger role, after much agonizing over the decision, for I didn't want to leave the production in the lurch, but I also knew that it wasn't fair to accept a role that I was not excited, or truly willing, to play.

So that is how I came to be doing Circle Mirror Transformation. We have our first read-through tonight. Sometime this week I'll write a post about how that goes!

Now You See Me

So going into this movie, I honestly knew very little about it. I had no idea what movie I wanted to see, so I had looked it up online, and I thought it looked cool. I watched the trailer and looked up some reviews, but upon seeing that they looked rather lukewarm, I decided not to read them and decide for myself. I often read reviews, but I'm trying to stop because they always color my opinion of the film (or show or book) in question. I would rather make my own decisions.

That being said, I truly disagree with the lukewarm reaction to this movie. I thought that it was fantastic! Alright, so it wasn't a work of any particular artistic genius, but it was incredibly enjoyable!

I loved the  stage show scenes; the magic was compelling and the scenes themselves were beautiful to look at. The sets were polished and perfect, the costumes were awesome, and the effects and pacing of the shows themselves were marvelous! The shows looked incredibly well-rehearsed and the actors did a wonderful job with their roles within the shows.

The characters of the Four Horsemen (the central magicians) were not particularly developed within the script. However, I think that works with their mystique. They spend the entire movie putting on a show and weaving a web for the audience, and it almost makes sense that we end up knowing very little about them. What we do see of them offstage is amusing and makes them into the clear protagonists of the movie. They are people I found myself wishing that I was friends with. Their relationships are believable and, despite not being touched upon very frequently, are not taken as far as to become ridiculous or fake. I love the Horsemen. I came home wanting to learn magic to become a Horseman. No lie.

I only had a few complaints about this movie. The characters of the agents pursuing our Four Horsemen are far more developed but far less compelling. I found myself caring very little about them or their relationship and found myself wishing for their defeat, for I wanted the Horsemen to emerge victorious. Plus, I think that Morgan Freeman was sort of wasted in a film like this that didn't give his character as much time as any Freeman character should deserve. Morgan Freeman is fantastic, but he was just lost in this spectacle of a movie.

I won't reveal any of the numerous plot twists that made this movie so incredibly compelling, but let me tell you that this movie holds you in its ever-evolving clutches until the very end! It kept me on the edge of my seat (quite literally) from start to finish!

Go see this movie! It is fun without being silly and spectacular without being untouchable. It is most definitely worth seeing on the silver screen for anyone who wants entertainment that is both escapist and intelligent!

Star Trek: Into Darkness

I'm going to preface this post with this fact: I love Star Trek. End of story.

However, I did not love this movie. I should probably say that I actually really liked the first Chris Pine Trek movie. It is my belief that these new movies are Trek for today's generation. There is nothing wrong with this; in fact, I'm grateful that these movies are introducing this absolutely beautiful franchise to more people. That being said, I think that these movies are your average modern-day action flicks, but set on a starship in space with aliens. I mean, let's be real: a young guy, tough, gets into fights, drives fast vehicles, and has sex with beautiful women. How more stereotypically action-film can you get? That was alright in the first one because it was well written, well acted, and had a solid and recognizable core of Trekness that made it a worthy addition to the Star Trek universe, but I did not see a strong element of traditional Trek in Into Darkness and that made it very hard to ignore the fact that it was essentially a beat-em-up movie set in space.

The effects in both are brilliant and I love the Enterprise done with modern technology; seeing it every time is a practically religious experience. They do the best they can to distract the audience from the violence-crazed, plotless pseudo-mess that is Into Darkness. I went to see this movie with a friend who knows absolutely nothing about Trek. He has never seen any of the series or the movies. (I don't really know why he suggested that we go see a Trek movie when there were so many other options, but whatever...) All he really had to say afterwards was that there was a whole lot of violence and things crashing into each other in space.

I'd say that was a pretty accurate description.

It was pretty devoid of character development, plot, sex, and anything else that may have made it even a little bit compelling. I will admit, there was one specific tearjerking moment, but other than that, the movie was entirely people bent upon beating on each other and starships crashing into things. I really don't know how the Enterprise didn't EXPLODE with all of the damage it was taking!

The plot was all over the place and occasionally nonexistent. During the film, I had no idea why the character of Carol Marcus was even included. It seems like I am not the only one. The internet and and Trek fanbases all over the world have exploded with the blatant sexism evident in the existence of that character. She did nothing in the entire movie but appear in her underwear; both degrading women and turning their role in Starfleet, a product of a supposedly advanced and enlightened world, into mere pretty decoration for the men who do all of the actual dangerous and fulfilling work. There was absolutely no point in her being naked; the scene did nothing for the (lacking) plot, so why was it there? I think we can all answer that  question ourselves.

I adore Benedict Cumberbatch and I am a dedicated Sherlock fan, so I have to say that I was thoroughly amused that Cumberbatch was prowling the streets of London in a black trench coat and scarf. Because who will ever say no to fan service, right? It was hilarious and wonderful and had absolutely nothing to do with the rest of the movie. Also, Chekov's reaction to his instructions to put on a red shirt was fantastic. Who isn't terrified when he or she is told to put on a red shirt? I know I would be! I laughed out loud. For a good length of time. It was a little embarrassing.

I love Spock and I think that Zachary Quinto does a lovely job. That was random but I wanted to say it.  He does a great job in an iconic and incredibly difficult role.

I don't really know how to sum up my feelings about this movie. It was just... disappointing. I'm just going to go back to good ole Star Trek: The Next Generation. Because is one of the best TV shows ever made. Period.

If you want a really good Trek movie, go watch Star Trek: Insurrection. Now that is what I call quality. I watched it the day after I saw Into Darkness to restore my faith in Star Trek. TNG for the win! Also, I just discovered that Season 1 of TNG is free on Hulu right now! Who is watching it again? This kid!

And with that, have a nice day.

My Revue Audition

Or, A Series of  Unfortunate Events

Welcome back (the author says to herself, the only reader of this blog)... So I recently auditioned for a Broadway Revue. What exactly is that, you may ask? I myself only recently learned of the existence of such shows, but I assure you that they are most definitely worth your time and money. A revue combines lots of acts together into a comprehensive night of entertainment. In the case of a Broadway revue, these acts are different songs from popular (or unpopular, depending on the revue) Broadway shows that are performed in a cabaret-style atmosphere, often as dinner theatre.

Almost falls during dance call? This kid!

Needless to say, I was incredibly excited to audition. I put on my tights, packed up my character shoes, and hopped in the car. I got to the audition space and, after hurriedly trying to figure out how to actually get inside, finally found the proper door only to rush in about 4 eight-counts into the dance audition. No worries, though. Those counts were mostly posing, which is easy enough to pick up. So I learned the dance call, which was relatively easy ( you won't find me complaining!) and wicked fun, we got through all of the preliminary stuff and finally got to do it. My character shoes are soled with suede, and I had never danced on carpet, and right before the one big kick in the routine I placed my foot a little wrong and... almost went flying during the kick! After a narrow miss with an encounter with aforementioned carpet, I (sort of) regained my feet and finished the dance with very little hope and quite a lot of embarrassment.

And then I got a dance callback.

Either they were being incredibly merciful or everyone else there was REALLY bad. I don't know which one I prefer. But I was allowed to stay for the dance callback, which was also the advanced dance audition, and it went much better. As in, I didn't almost fall over. I mean, God, who falls over in a dance audition?! <hides face in shame>

And of course, I forgot water, but I still had to sing. And I had to make a mad dash back out to my car to get my click track, because I left the CD in my car player. Of course. But honestly, it was the best vocal audition of my life.

So in recap, I got to the audition on time, but couldn't get inside the building, and therefore missed the beginning of the dance call. Then I almost fell flat on my face (literally) during the audition, somehow got a dance callback, managed to do that without falling, realized after doing incredibly fast dances to "Too Darn Hot" (ten points if you can name the show the song is from) that I forgot water, then had to sing, but realized I forgot my CD in my car, had to run back out to my car before they realized I was gone, somehow made it back before anyone noticed, and then had to sing on an almost-entirely cold voice without any water.

Not me. <cries>

And it was the best audition I've ever had. I don't know how that happened, but my song was as close to perfect as a mere mortal like myself can ever hope to achieve. I mean, I wasn't Bernadette Peters or anything (really though, who is...?)

I really hope I get in. I will keep you (I should say "me" because no one else reads this blog but me... And I don't even read it--I write it!) posted on what happens. They said that I should know in about a week. So hopefully in a week I'll be celebrating getting into my first revue.

But who knows. I mean, I am the kid that almost fell over in the dance audition. Really, who does that... but me?

A Brief History of Epic Summer Plans

My garden. Yeah right, kid.

It seems like every summer in living memory, I get the bright idea to do something. And not just do something, but really DO something. The summer between my fourth and fifth grade years, I decided to grow a garden behind my house. This was not just going to be any garden, though. This was going to be the motherload of all gardens; a garden to rival those of the Queen herself. Unfortunately, not only did I have no idea how to go about growing anything, the plot I was allotted for my project was about 90% rock and 10% dust. Seriously. It was a desert. My parents didn't want me to ruin their yard with my feeble attempts at gardening (something that, in hindsight, was probably a very good idea on their part) so I was banished to what we affectionately termed the "Moonscape." The Moonscape was the sad section of Earth between our yard and the backhoes and rock piles of the new neighborhood being built behind our house, and it is probably, after the Sahara, the worst place to attempt to grow anything unless you are related to Demeter herself. Needless to say, the garden never existed, much less produced a harvest. As an eight-year-old kid, I couldn't even figure out how to get seeds, much less plant them and actually remember to water them more than twice. And so the Moonscape remained a barren wasteland of dust and crushed gardening dreams.

The silver medalist. Not me.

A few summers ago, my big plan was to become the best rock climber of my generation. I had my harness and my chalk bag all ready to go, and the day before the last day of school my friend called me and asked if I wanted to go to the rock gym. As a future gold-medalist climber, I said yes. I was sort of joke-bouldering on a really easy wall, finished the climb, and instead of just letting go and free-falling to the mat like usual I decided to be more cautious. I thought to myself, Self, the last day of school is tomorrow. You don't want to get hurt before summer, do you? So I climbed halfway down the wall, jumped off, and proceeded to sprain my ankle. As my crutches and I sat around for the next month, I pondered what went wrong. I wasn't being stupid; bouldering walls are very low and are climbed without ropes, so the only real ways to get down are to climb or jump. Oftentimes, jumping is safer than climbing because of the predicaments one can get into while climbing down a complicated wall. I had always jumped, as did almost everyone in the gym. I had a mat underneath me like always, so nothing was different than any other day at the gym. I got hurt because I was trying so hard NOT to get hurt.



Alas, not me.

I have concluded, with much reflection, that the universe has decided that my epic summer plans, for whatever reason, are not going to ever come to fruition. However, that has not stopped me from trying, every single year, to DO something. Two years ago, I decided that I would start a book blog for the primary motivation to get free books from publishers. After a fervent week of posting, my blog slowly died, my drive squashed by the monotony of writing about the same thing every day. Last year, my friend and I decided to learn how to cook, a recipe a week, all summer. We proceeded to... completely forget about this plan.

So this brings me (finally) to the (entirely long-winded) point: this summer, I'm not going to be overly ambitious. I am merely going to attempt to blog. About what, you may ask? Whatever I feel like. I don't want to be limited in terms of subject matter or weekly "requirements." I'm just going to talk about my life, my thoughts, my opinions, and maybe my dreams. Who knows, I could actually accomplish this year's Epic (although not actually epic) Summer Plan. (And yes, capitalization is entirely necessary.)

Wish me luck!